Listen to Cancer Patients with an Open Heart

 The best listeners listen between the lines -Nina Malkin

Listening or to listen is not an uncommon word. We conveniently replace this word with hearing or to hear in spite of the difference in their meanings. A human by his nature itself wants his voice to be heard by others and wishes others to accept him for what he is. 

People being diagnosed with a hugely ‘celebrated’ condition like cancer will have a lot of concerns going through their mind whether they share it or not. They will have to deal with physical, emotional, psychological, social, financial and familial issues as an impact of cancer in their lives. Listening to them may not let you breathe easy but would definitely take you through the realities of life. 

The number of cancer cases being reported per year is on a hike. Starting from the diagnosis,   the voyage through the treatment is a devastating experience. People believe it as fatal regardless of its type and stage.  Despite all the awareness programmes and campaigns held to eradicate the fear that has been infused in people’s minds, the misconceptions and stigmas associated with cancer still remain intact. A Cancer patient requires medical as well as psychological support throughout this journey as there are chances that they might feel helpless and hopeless at any point  during the treatment phase or even afterwards .

Cancer diagnosis brings a lot of questions to the patient’s mind. Among them, the most frequently asked and the most disturbing one that they would have asked quite often to themselves would be ‘why me’?  for which the medical professionals may not have a correct or perfect answer to convey. It leaves them in more despair and agony.

Considering all these factors mentioned above. Listening to them is the first and foremost thing that can be done to ease their pain. Say the doctors, psycho oncologists or the caregiver, listening to them can make a difference in the patient satisfaction and associated Quality of life. 

Listening includes giving those ‘warriors’ the full attention and eye –contact. Your heart would start feeling their heartbeat at a point when you understand what they live through.  You shouldn’t judge or try to change the way the person feels or acts.  Give them ample time to go through their inner conflicts, fears, and talk to them when they are open to it.  

While listening to them ask open questions like what are they feeling as it allows them to speak out more about their deeper thoughts. Be prepared as they would speak up about death, suicide, uncertainties about future, religious concerns, survivorship issues and a lot more. You don’t have to make them feel worried about the right and wrong in their thoughts.  

Be ready to listen to whatever answer you get. The patient might not be looking for a solution or rather you won’t be able to provide a perfect solution as such but simply letting them share their thoughts can make him/her feel better. In addition, this may also give an insight into their own thought processes and thus guide them to reach a rational decision whereby a balance can be restored in their lives.